The One Where An Unmarried Woman Turns Thirty

  1. Nothing lasts forever. And I actually mean this in a good way, because when things feel their absolute WORST, it will.not.last.forever. But also, you know what, nothing lasts forever, so cherish things. Make the most of now, in whatever way you feel that you are able.
  2. When I feel helpless and lost and small, I think to myself, tonight the sun will set and tomorrow it will rise again. Because it will. This is just one day, and tomorrow things will start again.
  3. Ugly, belly laughing is the best. Not really advice, so maybe I’ll rephrase it as spend as much time ugly-gasping-for-breath-proper-belly-laughing as you can. Top up on all that soul joy.
  4. ‘Don’t look back, you’re not going that way’ — I honestly still lie in bed some nights, cringing about stupid things I’ve said or done when I was in year eight and awkward AF, but what good does this do me? We can’t live in the past because that will gnaw at your soul and destroy you. Believe me on this one.
  5. Another excellent quote: ‘I hope you live a life you’re proud of, and if you’re not, I hope you have the courage to start over again.’ This one really sums life up for me. In some small way, I’m trying to work towards the way I want my life to look or be every day.
  6. Money is this fake societal thing that holds us captive. Time is the ultimate currency. Spend it wisely, with people who matter. Not everyone will agree with me here, and that’s ok.
  7. Someone else’s success doesn’t diminish yours or make your experiences less valid. We’re fed this stupid idea that only so many people can be excellent, but this isn’t true. We can all be excellent. Lift each other up, fill the world with light.
  8. You are the only you and you are amazing at being you. You are more than the list of things that you’re scared of and you are more than money in the bank or the numbers on a scale. You are a beautiful, wonderful, sparkly ball of wonder and whatever today throws at you will be less than some days and more than others, but you are competent and capable.
  9. Eat your vegetables. Invest in nice bed sheets. Exercise. Drink lots of water. Create healthy coping mechanisms. Surround yourself with lovely people that lift you up. Lift up others. Be an ally. Don’t just listen, actually hear. Talk out loud about the way you’re feeling. Dance whilst you brush your teeth. Swish saltwater when you have a sore throat. Burn the fancy candle that you’ve been saving for ‘best’, because…
  10. Life is so fucking short. Scott and I have a joke, that’s not really a joke, more like an affirmation: I’m here for a good time, not a long time. It feels like life is this long, wonderful, spiralling road out in front of me right now. And I hope it is. I hope that I live until 103 but there’s something about birthdays that just makes me feel a bit morbid, but I think in a good way? Like there’s just something about birthdays that makes me question if I’m doing everything I can to live my best life. Check in with yourself, with your goals, your aspirations and your dreams regularly and just imagine what your life would be like if there was no such thing as money or distance or time.
  11. Life is messy and weird but also kind of wonderful and I think 2020 has proven that more than most years. Even if it has been a trash year. It’s the little life bits that happen in-between the big life events that I think really stay with us. I will never forget the nurse that held my hand whilst I had yet another biopsy on my cervix and asked about my holiday plans like we were just having a chat, and my legs weren’t in the dangly things and my pants tucked inside my shoes next to the bed. Remember when we were in peak lockdown and loads of people hung art or drew on their windows to make the roads colourful for keyworkers.

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Saloni Chamberlain

Saloni Chamberlain

Turning words into stories with packed full of feeling. Find me on instagram @salonichamberlain